Something Squirrelly this Way Comes

Well as some of you know I love cats. We had five cats and two dogs when I was growing up and there's only been two years in my life when I haven't had a cat. Actually, it'll be two years tomorrow - July 29.. Granted for 3.5 years in college I didn't have a cat living with me but there were still cats at my folks' house.

Several of yall also know about Gallagher. For those of you who don't, Gherster was my beloved persian, the last kitty I've had the pleasure of sharing my space with. Gallagher taught me patience, kindness, forgiveness, tolerance, respect and how to always look on the bright side of things. He was an amazing boy and I miss him dearly. I talk to him every day. I tell him that I love him and wish him a goodnight every time I go to sleep. He was my soulmate. I know some of you won't understand this, "He was just a cat. A pet. Pets don't have souls." and that's okay. My heart knows what it knows.

The following (in italics) is an email I sent on August 3, 2003 to a pet grief support group. Their response, kindness and understanding has helped me immensely and I'm still a member today. The words I wrote then say it all.

In January 1998 I found Gallagher via the local newspaper. The ad read Free Persians. I called a friend and we went over to the vet office where the cats were and we promptly fell in love with the two that were left, Gallagher and Gallagher Jr (as the breeder had named them). The breeder no longer wanted the responsibility of long haired cats and was giving them away - with no pedigree certificate, of course. Gallagher looked rather iritated, impatient, and bedraggled. I have no idea how long he had been in that cage, but as I later came to find out he had been in a wire cage for most of his life, leaving him rather bowlegged. He had recently been shaved and his white fur was growing back in rather odd clumps. He had horrible breath and supposed stomache problems. He had these amazing yellow-green eyes that held you and you just knew that he was smart. That he knew what would happen if nobody took him home, that he had to be wary and brave and take care of himself. I picked him up and he fought like a mad man, scratching and biting at anything he could reach. Of course I fell in love immediately and brought him home. My friend rescued Gallagher Jr and renamed him Pierre. He was approximately three yrs old. Gallagher was about ten.

At my own vet I found out the cause of his bad breath. Of the teeth he had left only six could be saved, the rest were rotting out of his mouth. He had no stomache problems, just bad hygiene. The duration and extreme bad oral health, evetually lead to kidney problems. He was never totally healthly and free of drugs for more than three months at a time. He had chronic ear problems, eye problems, respiratory problems, UTIs, kidney infections (he once spent nine days in the hospital on IVs because of his kidneys), chronic renal failure (crf), and in the end, breast cancer.

In mid-June my vet found a lump at one of Gallagher's nipples and she recommended having it removed and tested for cancer. She said that she'd never had a male cat test positive for cancer but that given Gallagher's health history and his 'ability' to have the worst luck, medically speaking, it would be wise to have the tumor removed and checked. I found out July 9, that he had breast cancer. Given his age the vet and I both agreed that invasive tests would not be tolerated well by Gallagher. He was already on four medications to keep him stable and recovered slowly from the surgery to remove the tumor. She wanted him to come in again in three weeks for a re-check.

Gallagher was barely eating - side effects from the antibiotics - so I was giving him whatever he wanted, even baby food. I noticed the weekend before he was to go back to the vet that his breathing was odd. I couldn't quite pinpoint what, exactly, just not the usual. I thought it was the heat and humidity and set out more water and lowered the temperature. On Monday night, I looked in his eyes and just knew. He had an appointment at the vet the next day, and I just knew I wouldn't be bringing him home. Xrays taken while at the vet showed fluid in the pleural cavity (space between the chest wall and lungs). Gallagher had less than half the normal lung expansion and severe pressure on his heart.

Given his overall health, the amount of fluid, and the energy Gallagher had to use just to breathe, the chances of him surviving surgery to install a chest drainage tube were ..none. I knew he wouldn't survive the sedation to insert a needle for a quick drain of some fluid and even then, if he did survive it, he'd have maybe two weeks before the fluid was back to the same level. Two weeks of struggling to breathe. I had him put to sleep last Tuesday July 29 (2003). My vet gives a sedative before the final shot so that there's absolutely no suffering. Though he continued to struggle for breath, he was gone before he got that final shot. I held him in my arms and watched him die. It's the hardest thing I've ever had to do. It doesn't help the pain any that it was the right thing to do, the best thing to do. He's still gone.

My vet did an autopsy and found another mass, just above Gallagher's diaphragm. Bloodwork showed elevated liver enzymes. Gallagher hadn't shown any liver problems previously. My vet theorizes that it was either liver problems that caused the build up of fluid (she told me the name of the disease but I don't remember) or cancer. I know it was the cancer. As soon as I heard about the fluid I knew, even before I read articles about fluid build up in breast cancer patients.

I've heard him meow a couple of times since his death. Even heard him sneeze earlier today. So I know he's around here, keeping an eye on things. I know he's healthy and happy now, free of pain and suffering, but it doesn't make it any easier to come home. He's not sleeping by the door when I come home so that he won't miss me when I walk in, he's not racing to hop on the chair before I can sit down, he's not in the kitchen demanding to be fed what I'm eating. Gallagher was, and is, the heart of ..everything. He was why I looked forward to coming home, why I went to work everyday, why I worked two jobs so that I could pay for his medication. Now there's nothing. The old saying "Home is where the heart is" is very true because I have no home now. Just a place with my stuff. Though, on those occasions when I do hear him, it's not so bad. Not quite a home, but more than house, if only for a moment.

As of Saturday afternoon, I have a new roommate. I haven't had one in about two years now. I'm not expecting any major issues, no fighting over the tv remote (I only get 1.5 channels so there wouldn't be much of a fight, regardless) or the thermostat, no bickering on what's for dinner. Only issue so far is the amount of food eaten and how often. I swear my roomie would eat all day long, if I didn't control his food. It's kinda hard for him to get access to his food, he has to have a special kind and I've put it well out of his reach. I'm not sure he could open the container, even if he could reach it.. Fins aren't very useful when it comes to opening packages. Did I mention that my new roomie is a male betta (aka Siamese Fighting Fish)?

I haven't decided on his name just yet.. I do know that it'll be Sir something Gluttony.. I was thinking Alfred, Alfonso, Alexander but I'm not sure. His nickname is Starvin Marvin though and sometimes Little Piggie.

The middle of his fins are mostly white with some faint reddish markings, the outer edges of his fins and his body are emerald, sapphire, turquoise and some hints of gold. He's very handsome and I'm sure he knows it as he hasn't bothered to flare his fins at me. The arrogant sot! ;) If I knew where my digital camera was, I'd post a photo of him. Maybe this weekend.

Found the link to this Harry Potter quiz and decided to post my result as it's eerily accurate.. Keep the mooning comments to yourselves, folks ;)

Got this from Keep Smiling!, a blog by Elims.

First of all, here are the instructions:
1. If you want to participate, leave a comment below saying "Interview me." "Blow me" or "Eat me" are not acceptable substitutes. However "bite me" I could work with... ;)
2. I will respond by asking you five questions - each person's will be different. I'll post the questions in the comments section of this post.
3. You will update your blog with this explanation, the questions, the answers to the questions and an offer to interview others in the same post.
4. When others comment asking to be interviewed, you will ask them five questions.

Second, here are the questions that were asked of me:

Q1. If you had to live without any of the 5 major senses, which could you live without? Which could you NOT live without?
A1. I could live without taste. Could not live without music!

Q2. If you had a supernatural ability (assuming of course, you dont already have one!), what would you choose?
A2. Read Strangers by Dean Koontz. The ability I want is ..discovered at the end of the book. I see it as one ability with many attributes not many abilities. I could tell you what it is and how it's gotten, but it would COMPLETELY ruin the story. Read it and get back to me or send me an email (clickie link on my profile or maybe on this page..) and I'll let you know what it is.

Q3. If you ruled your own country, what would you name it?
A3. Mavourneen. I was gonna say PITNOL but doubt most folks would get that *grin*

Q4. What do you think is the first thing people notice about you?
A4. Hrmmm.. Maybe that I'm quiet? Depends on when they meet me...

Q5. Describe the color purple.
A5. Equal parts blue and red.. Traditionally the color of royalty, quickly becoming the color to represent equal rights for gays and lesbians. A color that Bono looks hot in! *grin*

And it's Friday. I've been a total slacker, blog wise, this week. I was finally granted access to all the programs I needed access to at work. After nearly four weeks of fiddling my thumbs, staring at the institutional green cloth covered cube walls, crossword puzzles and internet surfing. Actually the programs were installed on Monday but they didn't work. Then I had to have more drives mapped on my machine, then I wasn't given all the rights to the programs, so I could login but couldn't do anything else. When you think about it all, it's kinda scary. I mean I work for the gov't and can only hope that with the Important stuff/people they're a lot more on the ball.

My big plans for the weekend include further unpacking and Sam's Club hunting. And probably reading a book or three and watching U2 on DVD. Assuming I can find all the cables to get my DVD player hooked up to my tv.

I feel bad I haven't posted an entry since Friday morning. I can't think of anything funny or witty or amusing to post about today either. My brain is in "I want to sleep! Why aren't you letting me sleep?! Right Now!!" mode. I think maybe the heat and humidity have scrambled it or poached it. Not really sure. I wonder if chefs are asked that question..

"Excuse me, Mr. Tyler Florence Chef Sir, but when the heat and humidity combine to make a heat index value of 100+ degrees, what kind of egg would that create in one's brain?"

Or would that be a question more geared towards a meteorologist?

"Excuse me, Mr. Mike Maze Meteorologist Sir, but when the heat is in the 90's and the humidity above 75% so that the heat index is a soupy 100+ degrees, what kind of egg would that create in one's brain?"

Or a neurosurgeon?

"Excuse me, Dr. Oliver Sacks Sir, but when the heat and humidity combine to make a heat index value of 100+ degrees, what kind of egg would that create in one's brain and would one still be able to think and function normally?"

I finally managed to get my brand spanking new VA license plates (and title and registration) yesterday. I went to put the front plate on and had a small issue, well two small issues. There are no holes for the front plate. NC doesn't require a front plate. But I *knew* that there should be holes there because I had Ohio plates on it before and Ohio requires front and back plates. I looked and looked, thinking maybe the holes were filled in with bug corpses, but nope. Nothing. Couldn't even feel the standard (or so I thought) dimples for guidance in license plate hole creating.

I checked the car's manual thinking maybe they would show where the dimples/holes should be (in case I was looking too high or too low), looked at other similar cars in the parking lot and called my dad on the phone (I have one of those awesome dads that you can call about anything at anytime and he'll do his best to help you out. Now he might laugh with you over the situation - see pumpkin pie entry - but he'll do his best to help, no matter what). Then the light bulb went on. I had wrecked my car a couple three years back and the front bumper was replaced. Which is why it's hole free.

My dad did an internet search to find a dealership nearby so that I could go flutter my eyelashes at them and get them to drill the holes for free. I drove by where the dealership was reported to be and nope, not there. Unless in VA you can sell cars from a grocery store and/or a McDonald's....

So I'm going to be the ultra cool, hip chick, driving around with shiny new VA plates attached with wire in the front until my dad can come down here and drill the holes for me. Woo Wee. Am I stylin or what? ;)

I was sitting at home yesterday afternoon/evening, watching it pour buckets outside. We had a lot of warning thunder and some seriously Groovy lightning before the sky opened up and the rain gushed onto the ground. All of sudden I had this "deep thought" until I realized that the answer was so obvious. My thought was "I wonder what was named first the rain shower or the shower in your bathroom? Which was named after which?" Then it occurred to me that, obviously, Rain showers had been happening Long before indoor showers were ever created. So, logically, the indoor plumbing was named after the nature event. But then again, maybe not. Either way, it made me laugh.

I wonder why the name Waterfall wasn't given to indoor showers instead of shower? Oh and random bonus internet kudos to whoever names the movie from which my blog title is quoting.

I know several of you have heard my ...vocalizations about the mutant crickets in my apartment, some have even seen a medium sized dead one, but I feel the need to let Everyone know about them.

They're brown, big, quiet, have lighter brown markings and creep me out. I swear to whatever diety you worship that they had to have mated with spiders cause they have eight legs!! Closest cricket I can come up with (thank you google) is the Camel Cricket, commonly called the Cave Cricket. I've posted a photo for you at the end of this entry. I may or may not leave it up cause it just creeps me out to look at it and the ones in my apartment don't look nearly so ...nice.

There's no mention of the camel cricket having eight legs either, which lends creedance to my theory that the crickets I've seen (and beaten to death with a curtain rod*^) are the descendants of a successful cricket and spider mating session (most likely a brown recluse - because of the brown on brown markings and my paranoia level *grin*).

*I used a curtain rod because the crickets jump too fast to smash them with a shoe - not that I would ever use a shoe as the crickets are big and, well, juicey, and the resulting sound and mess would make me ill not to mention that I'd have to get Close to the thing before I could effectively use the shoe.

^I first dropped a trash bag over the cricket before using the curtain rod. Sadly, the cricket was on one of my favorite t-shirts at the time. I don't know that I can ever wear it again, knowing that it had mutant cricket guts on it. Yes, yes all you mother types out there. It wouldn't have been on my shirt if my shirt hadn't been on the floor. But then I'd have cricket guts on my carpet and that would just be so gross.

Okay, removed the cricket photo, was creeping me out too much. Feel like I was tempting the Gods(esses) by having it on here, since I haven't seen any crickets *knocks on wood* for a couple days now. Here's a link to see a
photo of a Cave/Camel Cricket should yall feel the urge to take a look-see.

Apparently I'm blind. I managed to get beige latex paint on my hand and arm last night whilst entering my apartment building. Maintenance had painted the door to the building (thankfully Not the door to my apartment cause then my clothes would have paint all over them from banging it open with my hip and shoulder) sometime yesterday. It took lots of scrubbing to get rid of the paint - which is why I'm assuming oil based instead of water based paint.

This morning as I'm leaving my building I notice the "Wet Paint" signs - right smack dab middle of the door - and just shake my head at myself for yesterday's ..experience. I get to my car to get some soda out of the trunk (had my hands full the other day and couldn't carry the case inside, so now I just raid the trunk of a morning) and notice that I have paint on my hand. Silly me assumed the paint was dry but apparently it was too damn humid for it dry completely over night. Although the paint is on Top of my hand and I KNOW I didn't open the door with the back of my hand and this paint most definitely wasn't there Last night. Perhaps it dripped from the top of the doorway as I walked through? ACK! Is there paint in my hair?? Oh geez!!

Okay, crisis averted, no paint in my hair or on my clothes *whew*. That's one way to get your morning adrenaline boost. Man. Granted I wouldn't recommend it. So I guess I need to go scrub the crap out of my poor wittle hand again. Anybody have any turpentine I can borrow?

I so love U2. Love their webpage with the audio and video links. Just wish to heck that you could set it up so that you could play an Entire album without clicking on each individual song. Currently I'm listening to The Ground Beneath Her Feet which was only released in the UK on their All That You Can't Leave Behind album. It so totally kicks patootie!!! Video is heart breaking.

Oh yeah, I found my headphones last night so now I no longer have to listen to Ms. Slurpie Lips anymore. (Nearly said slurpie pants but that brings to mind an even more horrid image.. not to mention the potential olfactory issues...)

Ahem, so yeah, the song. Not that I'm biased or anything but the best part of the song is about 3/4 the way through where The Edge really starts rocking on the guitar. Hooooo wwweeeeeeee! Did I mention that I bought a Guitar World magazine entirely because he was on the cover? *grin*

One of my cubemates SLURPS her coffee, tea, soda, water, whatever she happens to be drinking. Cold, hot, lukewarm, doesn't matter. EVERY sip is sllurrrpppped up. It's driving me freaking crazy! I need to locate my headphones, still packed in a box.. somewhere in my apartment... so that I can retain my sanity.

Seriously one of my strongest pet peeves. People slurping drinks, soup, whatever. Such a horrid sound! And it's not like she's some slacker (okay, work wise she is but then most everyone Here is a worker slacker) nitwit who doesn't know proper etiquette. She dresses better than anyone else here, myself included, presents herself well, just typically gives the impression of a well rounded, classy (okay so classy is a bit strong but I can't think of the adjective one step below classy at the moment) person who knows that Sllluuurrrrrppppppping their beverage is a serious faux pas! Not to mention disgusting and cringe worthy! Ugh!!

And don't Get me started on her talking with her mouth full or chewing with her mouth open. Obviously decent dining habits were not a big deal in her house growing up.

So I was having issues on Friday with my formatting on here being all squirrelly. I applied the "fix" as directed in the Blogger Buzz/Help/News or whatever it's called section and that seemed to work..for OS' other than XP. I had my brother on the phone (if I can't do any work at work, why should he? I mean he IS my tech support, after all) and had him fiddle about some and neither of us could get it to format properly for XP. So I sent off a help request/"I have a boo boo on my blog" request and got a standard "We can't read all the emails at once, try the following for help, etc etc etc". I didn't bother to read the links because the email before that was from my bro saying "it looks fine with Mozilla".

I just checked my page(yes with XP) and the formatting is back to normal... Soooo either what my bro and I did on Friday just took some time to work or the blogger folks fixed it. I want to give a big thanks to my brother, the blogger folks and the mysterious PTB (powers that be) on the WWW for getting my squirrelly page to be less bad-squirrelly. Or something. ;)

I've gotten Dunkin Donuts coffee four times this week, three times it was horrid! First time EVER that I've gotten crappy DD coffee. I think it must be the location or the people or both. Maybe it's the fumes from the metro that waft up and soak into the coffee filter, beans, cups, ice, etc.

Speaking of the metro, I have not seen any guards armed with machine guns or with dogs on the metro - except on TV. Apparently the metro stops that I use aren't considered high profile enough to warrant such attention.. Or mayhap I just missed the 'inspections' in my travels. The dogs and powerful weapons would be the result of the bombings in London. All mass transit systems are at Code Orange for the next couple of days. The guards at my building were more vigilent yesterday but back to normal today. I do see armed guards everday at the metro and in my building, but they just carry hand guns nothing automatic.

Speaking of my building, I managed to fall down a half flight of stairs on my way to get lunch yesterday. This was after I smashed my thumb with a stapler that morning and ran over my toe with a chair before leaving my apartment (was barefoot and unable to "vent" my pain loudy as it was 5.15 in the morning and my neighbors were still slumbering). Stairs are of the cement and metal variety and quite sturdy ( you know bomb proof, fire proof, head hitting the stair chip proof, etc.). Thankfully I didn't hit my head or my back, just my leg and derrier. Yes, I have lovely bruises and it hurts to sit down and I was not wearing heels, I had on sneakers. (Stop laughing Toph!!)

So, yes, if yall haven't figured it out by now, I can be a bit of a clutz. There goes my image of being all graceful and surefooted. ;)